June 19, 2016

Old lady in the mirror


It is a balmy Sunday afternoon, and I feel an overwhelming need to write something. To talk to the universe in a monologue that showcases my deepest emotions and frustrations. You see, for the last 5 years, I have tried very unsuccessfully to find 'the one'. Tried to change myself, made some really crazy choices (moving half way around the world anyone?) and also worked on becoming fitter to fit into an ideal version of me. And yet, despite all of these attempts to conform to society's image of the perfect woman, I cant seem to find a man who is willing to share this life with me. Frustrating to say the least, but it makes me think that I am approaching this completely in the wrong manner. Instead of trying to change myself for this idea of what men are seeking, I need to just be content in being the person I am. I am never going to be the prettiest, the healthiest, the wittiest or the most intelligent woman out there. Nor am I going to be someone over whom men duel or fight to the death (hey a girl has to have some fantasies). But what I can be, is the best version of me. Someone who is living life in the best possible way that she knows. Someone who is flawed, dented, bruised but yet not broken. Someone who deserves someone equally flawed, dented and bruised. But guess what, I am not going to sit around waiting and feeling sad that it hasn't happened yet. My life is not defined by this one relationship. And if it is not meant to be, so be it. No use moping about another stupid and idiotic buffoon of a man who doesn't treat me the way I deserve.And if that means I live to be a 100 and a spinster, then what a crazy old lady with spicy stories I am going to be! Here's to the old lady who refused to bow down to society's rules and lived life one adventure at a time. Here is to the future me. 

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Very well said.. Same goes for all the goals of life; not just the men.

Mortal said...

Well to be honest that's a good outlook.

Don't give in cheers :)!