September 19, 2007

A bird in hand and two in the bush....

One thing that never ceases to amaze me is the inner workings of the mind of an average guy- your average Joe if u may...here are some of the things that iv learned about them:
1. Men like the chase better: Your average Joe would like to aim for a woman who is out of his league. He will do everything in his power to woo her, flatter her, give her gifts, drop hints of his interest in her- go to the extent of telling her he likes her. However, once the girl says yes and starts to show her emotions...boom...thats where it ends for most guys. They start to get bored. They want a change. They want the rush of working towards the next hot chick, the unattainable. It is reminiscent of wild game hunting. Once you hunt the game the rush of the hunt makes it imperitive to hunt again.
2. The friendship route: Once a woman Joe is interested in says she is not interested, Joe will inardvently try the friendship route. He will try and be her 12 am buddy, someone she turns to when she is in trouble. So that she becomes dependant on him. And then, when she is feeling particularly vulnerable is when he will suggest hooking up, playing on her confusion.
3. Of Gifts and dates: The average Joe knows nothing about gifts and significant dates. If he remembers his GF's bday (if), he will rush out and get her the most meaningless memorabilia. This usually translates into chocolates, flowers, soft toys and the u -cannot -go -wrong -with a little drawing...awwwww...its almost as if men have been given 'a list of things to pick at the last minute guide!' Dates never mean anything to most guys. Most men forget Valentines or anniversaries and cover up by saying i dont need a date to tell u that i care. ya right!
4. Flirting: Men- whether married, committed, engaged, to be engaged, or single, love to flirt. And dont feel guilty about it too. They love to engage in the play of eyes, a subtle message or two...and they never mind any extra attention. Never mind who is giving it to them.
5. The 'C' word: Most men run away from the 'C' word- Committment. If possible they would run a marathon in the other direction if the word crops up. The 'C' word immediately sets alarm bells ringing in Joe's head. It means an end to the tom foolery, it means being trapped! And we havent event spoken about the 'M' word yet.
6. Its ok for me but not u: Most men cannot see their girl getting any attention from other guys, except maybe to flaunt that she is his! So, its ok to show off ur GF as a prized possession, but if another guy tries to become friendly with his girl, Joe usually regresses into cave man antics. This is why most men hate any male best friends of their women. A man must guard his territory while being free to enjoy the attention of every other woman u see...
7. No more conversations: Once ur in a relationship with Joe, suddenly it seems like every conversation becomes an effort, any talk about "where we are" is usually met with a "lets not talk about it" or "do we have to!"....or even worse "There is nothing to talk about" reply...
8. Of flatulation/ breaking the wind: Somehow Joe has it in his head that the act of flatulation and burping in front of people is hilarious. And, he will never cease to display the same. And then guffaw about it too!
9. The average Joe always feels that he doesnt fall into any of the eight above mentioned categories!!! :P

11 comments:

Anonymous said...

if only guys would be as receptive as you

The Soothsayer said...

Hehehehe...if only it werent for the if onlys!!

Anonymous said...

I agree to most of what you are talking about. It's realistic. I like how you are delving deep into what really goes on. Let's face it you're right. So I can't argue or debate.

But thats 90% of guys you are talking about. The other 10% don't get seen or heard. And when the guys who fall in the other 10% of nice guys so to speak approach women they think that theyre all the same.

Unknown said...

So what are you complaning about?

Let's take up a few scenarios:

1. Men don't flirt - set aside the idea of the word 'flirt' derived from a root word more feminine in structure, let's suppose men do not flirt. So? No wonder, with the advent of so called sensitive 'metrosexuality', there has been a need to coin such provocative (what I think you will rather term as sexist) tag-lines as "Where are all the men gone". As if women have gone ascetic and sacrificed their instictive need to be flattered.

2. Men, Women and Friendship - let's face it, a man and a woman can have any other relationship between themselves but that specific relationship - 'friendship'. Friendship requires a similar wave length but drastically different from the wave length that promotes 'attraction'. Sad but true, even if a man was good enough I doubt if he doesn't have effeminate traits to boot.

3. Commitments and dates - the point then is what does a woman want? A wall-clock? I mean, it is faultless, always there and yes - it keeps ticking! Nature has been such that men have gone out to hunt and women stayed back gorverning the household. Different people, different sets of occupation. This in no sense means a woman should stay back at home but rather an understanding of the human genome's basic instinct. Man is to roam as woman is to tether them into soberity. The sooner we understand the lesser the mis-conceptions and un-attainable expectations.

4. Expression - of all things are drastically different between the two sexes. When men are depressed they retract into their own cocoon of silence and women go out for a manicure or shopping. Scientific study suggests a girl child is always 'coochicoo'ed at but a boy child communicates only in small grunts. That goes a long way to explain a man's idea of socialization ('Hi, mate! Wotzzup! Bye, mate!) and women's idea of a commune. It must be understood than debated. Men have a very limited range of emotions compared to varied shades of a woman and hence limited expressions which are necessary to communicate.

Civility comes at a cost - cost of nature. But try turn nature around and what women will be left with are 'Bobby Darlings'! Sounds scary? Hah!

Cheerio! :D

Unknown said...

i like the fact that the post is written for the average joe [;)] and so i rest my case !

eveeeeeeeel laffter !

Sahil Jatana said...

quite an impressive line up of thoughts u have! really appreciated! waiting for more to be up here! till then cheers!

sonali said...

is it that most of the comments i read here are written by your average "joes".. but that apart, yeah an interesting read.. heh heh

Anonymous said...

Good for people to know.

Apeksha:) said...

U r absoluttteeelyyy riteeee..
u knww..alll these things hv happned wid me...nt once twice bt thricee...I was about to write a book that - 100 reasons of why shouldnt a girl ever say "YES"??????

NotoriouslySerious said...

beautiful! :D

Scool said...

10.The things you that you still got to see in this life and guys(Other than average JOE) you haven't yet dated.